Bottom line: this phase brings both positive and negative challenges on the home front. Make sure you ask them what their expectations are before you begin the planning process. A host of mixed emotions may arise, from happiness to anxiety, so make sure to keep the lines of communication open on this subject with all members of the family. They probably share in that sense of relief as well, though they may also be feeling a bit of anxiety if they begin wondering if their family even needs them anymore.
Older kids might be relieved that their mom or dad will soon be home, but they might also feel anxious and wonder if they will be the same person they were when they left. Whatever their individual worries are, make sure to discuss this with your service member so they have a heads up before they get home. Make sure you inform extended family that this scenario may be possible and to make travel plans accordingly.
Many spouses have felt so out of place that they equate the homecoming experience to having their first kiss. It might take a while to get back into the romantic groove of things after being apart for so long. The first few days after their return, you and your service member may go through a honeymoon period. Everything feels new to both of you, including your relationship.
Bottom line: you and your service member will need to learn how to make decisions as a couple again. Children — Homecoming is just as exciting for your children as it is for you. It can be equally as confusing for them as well.
Your kids will need to re-establish their relationship with the returning parent, which can take a little while. They are used to always relying on you to answer their questions, give them permission and meet their needs. Your service member still needs to reintegrate back into the family, and this can be an adjustment for everyone. There will be some trial and error, as each family member has inevitably changed since the day your service member left for deployment.
Some spouses have no trouble giving the financial responsibilities right back to their service members upon their return, while others have become interested in managing the family finances. Either way, discussing your roles in areas like this will help head off any miscommunication. Children — Just as you and your service member are working to re-adjust after deployment, your children are as well. They may also begin acting out since there are now to parents to dole out needed discipline instead of one.
The deployment cycle of emotions will look different for everyone. You may stay in one phase longer than another, or your family may skip a phase altogether. No matter where you are in the deployment cycle, NMFA is here to help. So we have found ourselves in this crazy epidemic which many have a tug of war feeling about it … my husband and I had some personal issues we were trying to work on right before he was deployed and this is when this Covid was just starting to shut down everything.
We have a 3 year old and a 12 year old …. It was numbing for a bit. Trying to deal with the trying to move ahead right before he left me and the kids to go out to sea. And then they either complain bc they are driving each other crazy bc they have to be with them constantly …. So I have yet to see a commercial specifically like that. Just to maybe let those people know it could be worse. I understand the essential and the first responders are doing their part and we are so thankful.
I am just tired of turning on the tv and seeing people complain about being stuck in house with their family. But we have to be bc we are military wives. If parents successfully handle the stress of deployment, their children are less likely to have mental health or behavior problems. For more information see Children Coping with Deployment.
Experiences during deployment have helped make your family and service member more responsible. You have grown but you have also faced many challenges. Remember, readjustment following deployment takes time. Even if your service member has been called up before, you may find that new challenges arise with each reunion. Reunions can be happy and stressful. There is usually a "honeymoon" phase shortly after demobilization, but it will probably be temporary. Children have grown.
Your service member has been through traumatic experiences. You have had to face new situations in your service member's absence. You might also feel angry because you had to handle so much on your own while they were away. Family members at home have changed, too. You may have developed new relationships.
You may be feeling pride in what you were able to accomplish while your service member was away. For some couples, issues of infidelity may have arisen. Partners may need to talk about each other's commitment to the relationship. Family members are affected by the common stress reactions that occur after a service member spends time in a war zone. Know what types of reactions to expect.
These symptoms often have more to do with deployment to war than with the family, and remember that it takes time to readjust. Certain symptoms seem to have the greatest impact on relationships.
The most troublesome for newer Veterans following time in Afghanistan and Iraq seem to be sleep problems, dissociative symptoms problems with knowing who or where you are , and sexual problems. If symptoms continue, PTSD can develop and cause other problems. Parents and other family members of service members must make many of the same readjustments as partners. They, too, will have to realize that everybody has grown and changed. Their relationship with the returning service member will also be different.
While they take time to get reacquainted, they will need to be aware of boundaries. It's easy for parents and others who have cared for a service member in the past to fall into old patterns. They want to take care of their loved one again in ways the person no longer needs or wants. Many service members returning from deployment to the recent conflicts are reporting family adjustment issues. No matter what kind of deployment experience our Riveters are going through, we have created an environment at R.
Riveter that is as supportive as possible. Our Riveters are not only independent contractors for the company, they are also our family. We not only want to create portable income for military spouses, but create a space in the world that empowers them financially and emotionally.
How do you cope with deployment? We want to hear from you, comment below and share your thoughts. Close menu. All Handbags. Gifts and Home. Our Handbags. Our Process. Meet Our Riveters. Riveter Gives Back. Holiday Gift Guide.
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